Fatigued. Anxious. Depressed. In 2016, these were the words I described myself with more often than not. Medications and other substances were not my friend. Not in an abuse sort of way, but in a “they make me feel off” way. I wanted to try anything natural to get out of my rut. Anything to finally feel like ME. But finding me again seemed impossible.
Try 1: A personal trainer
Everyone said the best natural remedies were sleep, water, a healthy diet and exercise. So, I tried working out with a personal trainer for almost a year. I wasn’t seeing the results that I wanted, hated the drive to the gym, and didn’t have the accountability I needed nutrition-wise, so not much changed.
Then one day, a parent of one of my students mentioned her community of women overcoming anxiety and emotional eating and working together to build each other up. It was a group of women who were working out at home and eating better as well. It sounded too good to be true, especially when I realized I could do all of that for an entire year for the cost of two weeks with my personal trainer.
Try 2: At home workouts
It was tempting, but I had my doubts. I’d done Pinterest “at home workouts” before and either lost my motivation after a few days or seen zero results. I didn’t have much hope that these workouts would be any different, but I felt it was really my last chance to find me.
So I made the leap. I decided I’d give it one month. One month to follow the meals plans, the workouts, and be a part of the community. I even decided to try the shakes they were obsessed with. I was so sure it WOULDN’T change anything, but I had to give it my all for a little while.
One month later, I had lost inches, cravings, and some of my depression symptoms. I gained community, energy, and the feeling of accomplishment that had been mostly missing in my life. My “I guess I’ll try this for a month” is turning into a sustainable lifestyle one day at a time!
I never thought that I would work out consistently or make healthy food choices. I didn’t have good role models in that area. It had been pretty ingrained in me that I was lazy, un-athletic, and had a sweet tooth that was stronger than my willpower. When my depression was factored in to all that, finding me again seemed impossible.
Finding Me Again
I’m not perfect now, but I am happier. I have more energy. Food choices are easier than they were. I have a community that keeps me accountable. The workouts make me feel stronger and fill me with confidence that tells me I can conquer anything. I’m finding me again, and I love who I am becoming along the way.